I’m so angry, I’m shaking. This isn’t what I want to write about it. I want to write all kinds of good things about Monday night’s panel (which I will), but I’m just so over it. As seems to be the case so very often, some mundane task has to end in conflict simply because I’m on a bike. This is getting old. One of the things I said at the panel on Monday night was that you have to be thick-skinned to ride around here. I’m realizing now I’m not as thick-skinned as I thought.
I just got back from a short ride to the grocery store, which is about a mile away. My route is nothing but very quiet back streets and leads me directly to the grocery store parking lot. I was on my way back, riding with a smile, when I hear an obnoxiously loud honk and then some [exercising every ounce of restraint here] person revs her engine and passes me super fast to get to the light that is maybe 10 feet away.
I’m embarrassed to admit that I gave her a single finger wave–I’m usually very good about that, but it really pissed me off. Then I rode up next to her and waved at her to roll down her window. She ignored me for a bit but finally rolled it down. We had an exchange that went something like this:
M: “You know this is a residential street, right?
B: “Well you’re riding right in the middle of the lane! Why don’t you get out of the road?”
M “Because it’s the law. You should learn the law. And this is a 25 mile per hour residential street!”
B: “Well if you don’t want to get hit, I wouldn’t ride like that.”
M: “Is that a threat?”
B: “I wouldn’t tell my children to ride here. You should get out of the road.”
M: “Then that’s a problem that you should work on changing. This is a residential road. And you should learn the law.”
At that point, she shook her head and rolled up the window. I gave her the peace sign and just yelled, “Peace to you, lady.” Nothing conveys peace more than angrily shaking the peace sign at someone, I’m sure.
Then I cried the whole way home. It’s so lame. To be fair, my entire family (including me) has had the stomach flu since Monday night, so I’m not exactly mentally stable at this point. But I’m just so frustrated. I wish I knew The Right Way to handle conflicts like this. Or even better, I wish they would stop happening so much. Conflict like this just wears me out. I defuse enough fights with two kids that I simply don’t want this risk hanging over my head every time I make a run to the grocery store. To be honest, this plays a significant part in why I dread my ride to work–I feel like I am always on edge, waiting for that honk. I JUST WANT TO RIDE MY BIKE, PEOPLE!
Is there a right way? Should I write a script so I can calmly convey all the points I want to get across next time? Is it possible to handle these situations in a way that leaves you at least feeling like you made some headway?
